For Coach

Buzz!
Ughhh 6:30 AM
But it's ok...
It's Saturday.
Time to wake up and play tennis.
Time to see the crazy old man in the fishing hat,
who tests us to see if we can
handle the heat of the kitchen without choppin the broccoli,
or catch the butterfly without being an Indian with two tents.
Time to hang with the other tennis biotches and go on an epic search for gummy worms.
But now practice is over, and so the game,
Time to take the winnings: all those years of education
and say good bye to the crazy old man who helped teach us so much
and opened our eyes to the world.

High

I am the sand.
The waves come crashing onto me.
I can't grasp them, yet they manage to drown me in their power.
I am thrown all over, trying to find the ground
But I just keep moving.

I'm scared I want to stop, but the waves won't let me go
and my cries go unheard.

I am trapped in an ocean of never ending emotions that i can't
escape.

Come Away With Me

Come on an adventure with me,
and never leave my side.
We'll find the richest treasures of diamonds and gold,
but we'll only keep the pearls.
We'll forever venture side by side,
discovering the world,
and each other.

Apology

Dear ___,

    

   You have put up with my crazy moods for years and still continue to love me, why? I am terrible to you and all you ever do is call me rude. I just hate that you can take the abuse and still love me. I feel so guilty because I know I can't change. You say I've never technically yelled at you, but that's because I want to yell at you pretty much all the time and for the dumbest things but I keep it in; because I don't want to hurt you. But eventually the words come out, and instead of one little brawl, I manage to take a weeks worth of anger and throw it at you. 

I'm constantly furious at you, but I constantly love you.

Anyways although this is like the WORST apology ever... I'm sorry for being ... me. 

You know who you are, and although I already know you will forgive me, I needed to say it, and you needed to hear it.

P.S. I love you. 

College Search

Just got back from a week long road trip touring colleges in Northern California with my mum and Chloe. It made me realize that I am way too picky and I'm scared to leave, in the end I still vote Northern Arizona University as my favorite. We toured/ looked at 5 colleges, drove more than 24hrs total, traveled a thousand or so miles and I hated them all...how sad.

She Had No Enemies, Except Herself.

Down
Down
Down
She can't escape.
The words keep pulling at her.
Drowning in a pool of insecurity.

Road Trip

For Spring Break I am going on a road trip with my mum and my family friends to go see colleges. I'm scared. I don't want to think about college... I want to be out of high school, but not out on my own. I suppose we all have this fear, but I guess my biggest fear about college is that I will hate it and feel guilty for wasting time and money.
Another thing I  fear is that if I leave to a far away school, what will I do when I come home during Summer, will there be anyone left in boring Alta Loma???